Going in, based on the title alone, you know it's not going to be a walk in the park, but while I applaud McCurdy for laying it all out for readers, it also wasn't an easy or enjoyable read. And it's not meant to be.
With unflinching detail, McCurdy details her experiences being exploited as a child star and her toxic relationship with her narcissistic mother who was abusive - emotionally, physically, verbally and sexually. This was a woman who encouraged her daughter's eating disorders and dysmorphia, damaged her daughter's mental health and self worth as she used her daughter to live out her own dreams of Hollywood success.
McCurdy's relationship with her mother is complex and extremely damaging and I applaud McCurdy for candidly sharing her conflicting feelings towards her mother - a woman that she loved, tried to please, but often also hated. A woman whose mercurial moods and love were contingent upon her daughter's success, weight and popularity.
This is not an easy or enjoyable memoir to listen to. It is an uncomfortable read but it is well-written, honest and I appreciated the bits of humour to balance out the darker elements. This memoir sheds a light on the experiences of some child actors whose happiness, mental health and self image/worth are at the hands of an industry (and sometimes family) who often have their own agendas. I hope McCurdy has found her happiness and is overcoming the decades of trauma she experienced at the hands of her own mother.
My Rating: 4 stars
Author: Jennette McCurdy
Genre: Memoir
Type and Source: eAudiobook from public library
Run Time: 6 hours, 50 min
Narrator: Jenette McCurdy
Publisher: Simon and Schuster Audio
First Published: August 9, 2022
Book Description from GoodReads: A heartbreaking and hilarious memoir by iCarly and Sam & Cat star Jennette McCurdy about her struggles as a former child actor—including eating disorders, addiction, and a complicated relationship with her overbearing mother—and how she retook control of her life.
Jennette McCurdy was six years old when she had her first acting audition. Her mother’s dream was for her only daughter to become a star, and Jennette would do anything to make her mother happy. So she went along with what Mom called “calorie restriction,” eating little and weighing herself five times a day. She endured extensive at-home makeovers while Mom chided, “Your eyelashes are invisible, okay? You think Dakota Fanning doesn’t tint hers?” She was even showered by Mom until age sixteen while sharing her diaries, email, and all her income.
In I’m Glad My Mom Died, Jennette recounts all this in unflinching detail—just as she chronicles what happens when the dream finally comes true. Cast in a new Nickelodeon series called iCarly, she is thrust into fame. Though Mom is ecstatic, emailing fan club moderators and getting on a first-name basis with the paparazzi (“Hi Gale!”), Jennette is riddled with anxiety, shame, and self-loathing, which manifest into eating disorders, addiction, and a series of unhealthy relationships. These issues only get worse when, soon after taking the lead in the iCarly spinoff Sam & Cat alongside Ariana Grande, her mother dies of cancer. Finally, after discovering therapy and quitting acting, Jennette embarks on recovery and decides for the first time in her life what she really wants.
Told with refreshing candor and dark humor, I’m Glad My Mom Died is an inspiring story of resilience, independence, and the joy of shampooing your own hair.
I've been curious about this book as I've heard so many good things about it. Like you, I know nothing about the writer as an actor. Thanks for the review. I'm definitely putting it on my list.
ReplyDelete